I khumbula insizwa iza kwami eminyakeni eminingana edlule nezinkinga zomshado. Wayefuna iseluleko sami, noma kunjalo wathi. “Ngeke angilalele!” ekhononda. “Akufanele yini azithobe kimi? ImiBhalo ayisho yini ukuthi ngiyinhloko yomkami? Yini inkinga yakhe !? ” Ngangibazi kahle ubudlelwane ngokwanele ukwazi ukuthi ukuzibuka kwakhe kwakungathandeki kahle. Ngakho-ke ngaphendula, "Awu, uthini uSt. Paul futhi?":
Madoda, thandani omkenu, njengalokho noKristu walithanda ibandla, wazinikela ngenxa yakhe, ukuze alingcwelise, emhlambulula ngokumgeza ngamanzi ngezwi, ukuze ethule kuye ibandla likhazimula, lingenabala noma mibimbi noma into enjalo, ukuze abe ngcwele futhi angabi nasici. Kanjalo futhi amadoda kufanele athande omkawo njengemizimba yawo. Lowo othanda umkakhe uzithanda yena. (Efe 5: 25-28)
“Uyabona-ke,” ngiqhubeka, “ubizelwe ukunikela ngempilo yakho ngenxa yomkakho. Ukumsebenzela njengoJesu. Ukumthanda nokumenzela umhlatshelo ngendlela uJesu akuthanda futhi wanikela ngayo ngenxa yakho. Uma wenza lokho, cishe ngeke abe nezinkinga 'zokuzithoba' kuwe. ” Nokho, lokho kwayithukuthelisa le nsizwa eyaphuma ngokushesha endlini. Into ayeyifuna ngempela ukuthi ngimnikeze izinhlamvu zokugoduka aqhubeke nokuphatha umkakhe njengomnyango wokungena emnyango. Cha, lokhu akuyona into uSt.Paul ayeqonde ngayo ngaleso sikhathi noma manje, umehluko wamasiko eceleni. Lokho uPawulu ayekhuluma ngakho kwakuwubuhlobo obusekelwe esibonelweni sikaKristu. Kepha leyo modeli yobudoda beqiniso ifakiwe ...
NGAPHANSI KOKUHLASELWA
Okunye ukuhlaselwa okukhulu kunakho konke kuleli khulu leminyaka elidlule bekulokhu kubhekene nenhloko yomoya wekhaya, indoda nobaba. La mazwi kaJesu angasebenza kahle kubaba:
Ngizoshaya umalusi, izimvu zomhlambi zihlakazeke. (Math 26:31)
Lapho ubaba wekhaya elahlekelwa umuzwa wenhloso nobuyena beqiniso, siyazi ngokuhlangenwe nakho nangokwezibalo ukuthi kunomthelela omkhulu emndenini. Ngakho-ke, uPapa Benedict uthi:
Inkinga yokuba ngubaba esiphila kuyo namuhla iyinto, mhlawumbe ebaluleke kakhulu, esongela umuntu ebuntwini bakhe. Ukuqedwa kobaba nokuba ngumama kuxhumene nokuqedwa kokuba ngamadodana namadodakazi ethu. —UPOPE BENEDICT XVI (UKhadinali Ratzinger), uPalermo, Mashi 15, 2000
Njengoba ngike ngacaphuna lapha ngaphambili, uBusisiwe uJohn Paul II wabhala ngokwesiprofetho,
Ikusasa lomhlaba neleSonto lidlula emndenini. -I-Familiaris Consortio, hhayi. 75
Umuntu angasho futhi ngezinga elithile-ke ukuthi ikusasa lomhlaba neBandla udlula kubaba. Ngoba njengoba nje iSonto lingenakuphila ngaphandle kobupristi besakramente, ngokunjalo, ubaba uyinto ebalulekile yomndeni ophilile. Kepha yeka ukuthi bambalwa kangakanani abantu abakuqondayo lokhu namuhla! Ngokwesiko elithandwayo kuye kwasusa kancane isithombe sobudoda beqiniso. Ubufazi obunamandla, nawo wonke amahlumela, kunciphise amadoda abe yifenisha nje ekhaya; isiko nokuzijabulisa okudumile kuphenduke ukuba ngubaba ihlaya; futhi imfundiso yenkolo yenkululeko ifake umuthi womuntu umthwalo wemfanelo njengomuntu oyisibonelo ngokomoya kanye nomholi olandela ezinyathelweni zikaKristu, iwundlu lomhlatshelo.
Ukunikeza isibonelo esisodwa nje sethonya elinamandla likababa, bheka ukuya esontweni. Ucwaningo olwenziwa eSweden ngo-1994 lwathola ukuthi uma bobabili ubaba nomama beya njalo esontweni, amaphesenti angu-33 ezingane zabo azogcina esiya njalo esontweni, kanti amaphesenti angama-41 azogcina ngokungayi njalo. Manje, uma ubaba angajwayelekile futhi engumama ojwayelekile, amaphesenti angu-3 kuphela wezingane kamuva ziyohlala zijwayeleka, kuyilapho amanye amaphesenti angama-59 azoba yizinto ezingejwayelekile. Nakhu okumangazayo:
Kwenzekani uma ubaba ejwayelekile kepha umama engafanele noma engasebenzi? Ngokungajwayelekile, iphesenti lezingane eziba njalo lenyuka lisuka emaphesentini angama-33 laya emaphesentini angama-38 ngomama ongajwayelekile futhi laya kumaphesenti angama-44 ngomama ongasebenzi, sengathi ukuthembeka kokuzibophezela kukababa kukhula ngokulingana nokuyekethisa kukamama, ukunganaki, noma ubutha . -Tyena Iqiniso Ngabesilisa Nesonto: Ngokubaluleka Kobaba Ekuya Esontweni nguRobbie Low; ngokusekelwe ocwaningweni: "Izici zobuningi babantu bamaqembu ezilimi nezenkolo eSwitzerland" nguWerner Haug noPhillipe Warner weFederal Statistical Office, uNeuchatel; IVolumu 2 yezifundo zePopulation, No. 31
Obaba banomthelela omkhulu ngokomoya ezinganeni zabo ngokuqondile ngenxa yendima yabo eyingqayizivele ngokulandelana kwendalo…
UBUPRISTI BOBABA
ICatechism ifundisa:
Ikhaya lobuKristu liyindawo lapho izingane zithola isimemezelo sokuqala sokholo. Ngalesi sizathu ikhaya lomndeni libizwa kufanele ngokuthi "isonto lasekhaya," umphakathi womusa nomthandazo, isikole sezimfanelo ezinhle zomuntu kanye nesisa senhliziyo sobuKristu. -Ikhathekizimu leSonto LamaKatolika, hhayi. 1666
Ngakho-ke, indoda ingabhekwa umpristi emzini wakhe. Njengoba uSt. Paul ebhala:
Ngokuba indoda iyinhloko yomfazi, njengokuba noKristu eyinhloko yebandla, yena uqobo engumsindisi womzimba. (Efe 5:23)
Kusho ukuthini lokhu? Yebo, njengoba indaba yami ikhombisa ngenhla, siyazi ukuthi lo mbhalo ukubonile ukuhlukunyezwa kwawo eminyakeni edlule. Ivesi 24 liqhubeka lithi, “Njengoba ibandla lingaphansi kukaKristu, kanjalo nabafazi mabathobele abayeni babo kukho konke.” Ngoba lapho amadoda enza umsebenzi wawo wobuKristu, abesifazane bazobe bezithoba kulowo ohlanganyela futhi ebaholela kuKristu.
Njengamadoda nabesilisa, ngakho-ke, sibizelwe ebuholini obungafani nobunye bokomoya. Abesifazane nabesilisa bahlukile impela — ngokomzwelo, ngokomzimba, futhi ngokuhleleka ngokomoya. Kunjalo kuyahambisana. Futhi bayalingana nathi njengezindlalifa kanye noKristu: [1]qhathanisa Catechism weSonto LamaKatolika,n. 2203
Ngokunjalo, nani madoda kufanele nihlale nabafazi benu ngokuzwana, nihloniphe abesilisa besifazane ababuthakathaka, ngoba siyizindlalifa ezihlangene zesipho sokuphila, ukuze imithandazo yenu ingathiyeki. (1 Pet. 3: 7)
Kodwa khumbula amazwi kaKristu kuPawulu athi “amandla enziwa aphelele ebuthakathakeni.” [2]I-1 Cor 12: 9 Lokho wukuthi, amadoda amaningi azovuma ukuthi amandla awo, awo rock ngamakhosikazi abo. Futhi manje sibona imfihlakalo ivuleka lapha: umshado ongcwele uwuphawu lomshado kaKristu neBandla.
Le yimfihlakalo enkulu, kepha ngikhuluma ngibhekise kuKristu kanye nesonto. (Efe 5:32)
UKristu wanikela ngempilo yaKhe ngenxa yoMlobokazi Wakhe, kodwa Yena amandla iSonto futhi limvusela endaweni entsha "ngokugeza amanzi ngezwi." Eqinisweni, ubiza iSonto njengamatshe esisekelo kanti uPetru ubiza ngokuthi “idwala.” Lawa magama ayamangalisa, empeleni. Ngoba lokhu uJesu akushoyo ukuthi ufisa ukuthi iBandla lihlanganyele kanye Naye; ukwabelana ngamandla Akhe; ukuba ngokoqobo abe "umzimba kaKristu", munye nomzimba Wakhe.
… Laba ababili bayakuba nyamanye. (Efe 5:31)
Isisusa sikaKristu ukuthanda, uthando olungenakulinganiswa oluboniswa ngomusa waphezulu odlula noma yisiphi isenzo sothando emlandweni wesintu. Lunjalo-ke uthando amadoda abizelwe lona komkabo. Sibizelwe ukugeza omkethu nezingane eZwini likaNkulunkulu 
ukuze ngolunye usuku bame phambi kukaNkulunkulu “bengenabala noma mibimbi.” Omunye angasho ukuthi, njengoKristu, sinikeza "okhiye bombuso" edwaleni lethu, kubafazi bethu, ukubenza bakwazi ukukhulisa nokunakekela ikhaya endaweni engcwele nenempilo. Kufanele sibanikeze amandla, hhayi ukweqa kubo.
Kepha lokhu akusho ukuthi amadoda kufanele abe yizimpungushe-izithunzi ezincane ekhoneni ezenza yonke imithwalo yemfanelo kubafazi bazo. Kepha yilokho okwenzekile emindenini eminingi, ikakhulukazi emazweni aseNtshonalanga. Iqhaza labesilisa selinciphile. Imvamisa amakhosikazi ahola imindeni yawo ngomkhuleko, ahambisa izingane zawo esontweni, akhonza njengabafundisi abangajwayelekile, futhi aze aphathe isifunda ngendlela yokuthi umpristi usayine izinqumo zakhe. Futhi zonke lezi zindima zabesifazane emndenini naseBandleni zinendawo inqobo nje uma kungezukukhokhelwa ubuholi obungokomoya obunikezwe uNkulunkulu ngabantu. Kuyinto eyodwa ukuthi umama ahluleke futhi akhulise izingane zakhe okholweni, okuyinto enhle kakhulu; kungenye futhi yokuthi enze lokhu ngaphandle kokuxhaswa ngumyeni wakhe, ubufakazi, nokubambisana kwakhe ngenxa yokunganaki kwakhe noma ukuba kwakhe nesono.
INDIMA YENDODA
Kwesinye uphawu olunamandla, umbhangqwana oshadile ubalulekile njengesithombe sikaZiqu-zintathu Ongcwele. UBaba uyayithanda iNdodana kangangoba uthando lwabo luzala umuntu wesithathu, uMoya oNgcwele. Ngokunjalo futhi, indoda imthanda ngokuphelele umkayo, nomfazi indoda yakhe, ukuthi uthando lwabo luveza umuntu wesithathu: ingane. Indoda nowesifazane, ngakho-ke, babizwa ukuba babonakalise uZiqu-zintathu Ongcwele komunye nomunye nasezinganeni zabo emazwini nasezenzweni zabo. Izingane namakhosikazi kufanele babone kuyise isibonakaliso sikaBaba waseZulwini; kufanele babone kunina isibonakaliso seNdodana noMama Isonto, okungumzimba waKhe. Ngale ndlela, izingane zizokwazi ukwamukela ngabazali babo umusa omningi woMoya oNgcwele, njengoba nje sithola umusa wesakramente ngobuPristi oNgcwele kanye noMama weSonto.
Umndeni wamaKrestu ukuhlangana kwabantu, uphawu nesithombe sokuhlangana kukaYise neNdodana kuMoya oNgcwele. -Catechism weSonto LamaKatolika,n. 2205
Ubaba nobufazi bubukeka kanjani? Ngeshwa namuhla, ayikho neze imodeli yokuba ngubaba okufanele uyihlole
. Ubudoda namuhla, kubonakala sengathi kumane kuyibhalansi efanelekile yenhlamba, utshwala, nemidlalo yethelevishini ejwayelekile enenkanuko (noma eningi) yenkanuko ephonswe ngesilinganiso esihle. Okudabukisayo eSontweni, ubuholi bokomoya bunyamalale kakhulu epulpiti umfundisi esaba ukuphonsela inselelo isimo esikhona, ukunxusa izingane zabo zokomoya ebungcweleni, nokushumayela iVangeli elingadalulwanga, futhi-ke, baliphile ngendlela ebeka amandla isibonelo. Kepha lokho akusho ukuthi asinazo izibonelo esizodlula kuzo. uJesu uhlala eyisibonelo sethu esikhulu kunazo zonke nesiphelele sobudoda. Wayemnene, kodwa eqinile; mnene, kepha akayekethisi; ehlonipha abesifazane, kodwa eneqiniso; nangabantwana Bakhe abangokomoya, Wanikela konke. Ngesikhathi egeza izinyawo zabo, wathi:
Ngakho-ke, uma mina, njengomphathi nomfundisi, ngigeze izinyawo zenu, bekufanele nigezane izinyawo. Ngikunike isibonelo okufanele usilandele, ukuze njengoba ngenze kuwe, nawe wenze. (Johane 13: 14-15)
Kusho ukuthini lokhu empeleni? Lokho ngizokukhuluma ekubhalweni kwami okulandelayo, konke kusuka kumkhuleko womndeni, ukuyala, nokuziphatha kwendoda. Ngoba uma thina madoda singaqali ukuthatha ubunhloko obungokomoya okuyisibopho sethu; uma singakunaki ukugeza omkethu nezingane ngeZwi; uma ngenxa yobuvila noma ngokwesaba singathathi umthwalo nodumo okungokwethu njengamadoda… khona-ke lomjikelezo wesono “osongela umuntu ebuntwini bakhe” uzoqhubeka, futhi “nokonakala kokuba ngamadodana namadodakazi ethu” oPhezukonke uzoqhubeka, hhayi emindenini yethu kuphela, kodwa nasemiphakathini yethu, ebeka lona kanye ikusasa lomhlaba engcupheni.
Lokho uNkulunkulu asibiza ngakho njengamadoda namhlanje akuyona into encane. Kuzodinga ukuzidela okukhulu uma sizophila ngokuvumelana nomsebenzi wethu wobuKristu. Kodwa akukho okumele sesabe, ngoba umholi nomphelelisi wokukholwa kwethu, uJesu — uMuntu wabo bonke abantu — uzoba usizo lwethu, asiqondise, futhi abe namandla ethu. Futhi ngenkathi ebeka phansi impilo yakhe, kanjalo futhi, wayithatha futhi empilweni engunaphakade…
UKUFUNDA OKWENGEZIWE:
Chofoza ngezansi ukuhumushela leli khasi olimini oluhlukile:
